How to Get Over the Fear of Putting Yourself Out There
What to do when showing up online feels like swimming with sharks.
You’ve quit your comfy day job, launched a business and invested your savings into something that may or may not work out. I don’t know about you, but I think that takes a bucketload of bravery.
And yet, so many entrepreneurs stop there.
They happily take on all the risks involved with starting a business (and there sure are a truckload of those) but baulk at the thought of putting themselves out there.
I get it.
Stepping into the spotlight means opening yourself up to criticism, rejection and trolls. Of course it feels scary.
Guess what? Everyone else feels like this too.
It frustrates me whenever someone says, “Steph, I wish I could be as fearless as you.”
I’ll be the first one to tell you: Launching a podcast felt scary. Sharing an Instagram Reel of my terrible dance moves felt scary. Teaching a live webinar to hundreds of people felt scary.
None of this is about being fearless.
The difference between people who put themselves out there and those who don’t is the old cliche: They feel the fear and do it anyway.
When the fear pops up — that niggling voice at the back of your mind; that tightening in your chest — you have two choices:
- You can let it get the better of you and stop you from moving forward, or
- You can look it in the eye, give it a wink and just do it anyway.
Fear is a good thing — it exists to keep you alive. Back when we were cavemen and cavewomen, social rejection meant being left to fight off the sabre-toothed tiger, by yourself. Rejection quite literally meant death.
The primal parts of your brain simply haven’t figured out that rejection isn’t a life or death situation anymore.
It gets easier the more you do it.
You’re never EVER going to feel “ready” to do that thing you’ve been putting off. The magic lies in doing things before you’re ready — committing to them and then figuring it out along the way.
Doing things before you’re ready is a great hack for growing your business quickly. It’s what helped me to scale my business to over $1 million in 2020.
This is because fear shows you the pathway to your growth. The things that feel most uncomfortable? They’re usually the ones that have the biggest impact on your business.
But, what if someone says something mean and nasty?
The online world sucks. There are bottom-feeders out there who thrive on negativity. Yes, you might fall victim to a nasty comment, but that doesn’t mean anything about you.
People who make these sorts of comments are coming from a mindset of lack; they believe that they aren’t enough or don’t have enough. Their negative comments say a whole lot more about who they are, than who you are.
None of us really knows what we’re doing anyway
For my first 2 years in business, I thought I was the only one who didn’t know what I was doing, and that held me back from showing up online.
It was only after I started to make friends with other business owners that I realised I wasn’t the only one making it up along the way. Nearly everyone else was doing the same thing, only we were all too embarrassed to admit to each other that we didn’t have it all perfectly figured out.
When you’re brand new in business-land, you can only compare yourself to what other businesses look like on the surface. But, the facade is only half of the story — some of the most slick-looking businesses I know are the ones that are struggling behind the scenes.
My challenge for you
I want you to commit to doing something that scares you this week. Maybe you’ll share your first podcast episode, or you’ll host a webinar, or you’ll publish that blog article you’ve been scared to share.
Yes, I know you don’t feel “ready” — but you’re never going to be. And there’s no better time to put yourself out there than right now.
